Never Look Back (Except Now)

[Since I've been a tad interested in politics lately, let's revisit two posts from the past about Lyndon LaDouche, er, I mean, LaRouche. Oh, yes, let's go there.]

I Can Say Without Equivocation
December 22, 2003

A few words about presidential hopeful Lyndon LaRouche. I can say without equivocation that I DESPISE the people that work for his campaign. Yes, I have HATE in my heart for them, whether they are mere volunteers or whether they are paid for their efforts. For the life of me, I cannot figure out if they are just genuinely unpleasant people or if their unpleasantness is an attempt to hide a dirty secret like they all sacrifice virgins and drink the blood. I have had three encounters with LaRouche's people, and each encounter got increasingly uncomfortable and disturbing.

LaRouche's people stand on street corners in a ragtag spirit of grassroots enthusiasm and seem to want to engage people in friendly political conversation—but when they fail to convince people of LaRouche's viability as a candidate, their tactics quickly devolve into name-calling, insult-hurling, and general antagonism. And if that doesn't work, they follow you down the street and around corners until you scream something like "Rape!" to get them to go away.

Encounter Number One. A woman who we'll call "Shiela" handed me some literature, and I took it gladly because I didn't know anything at all about LaRouche. As a well-known economist, LaRouche's platform was all about the economy, and Shiela kept emphasizing his plans to get California out of its financial crisis. The economy is important, sure, but I was also curious about LaRouche's position on other equally important issues, such as education, abortion, guns, the military, civil rights, etc. Shiela wouldn't tell me where he stood on anything other than the economy. She said that's why George Bush is in office—because the naive people of the United States were concerned about the issues and just the issues. (As if the "economy" isn't an "issue.") I asked her if LaRouche was ever going to take a position on any of the issues. She said, with hesitation, "Yeah." I walked away, dumping the campaign materials in a trash can.

Encounter Number Two. In an effort to force me to volunteer for LaRouche's campaign, "Mark" began following me, asking aggressively, "What're you doing this weekend? What're you doing this weekend?" Over my shoulder, I said, "I'm busy." Mark stopped dead in his tracks and sneered, "I can't hear you with your back turned towards me, pal."

Encounter Number Three. Today. In a friendly attempt to explain my previous ridiculous encounters with LaRocuhe-ites, "Albert" showed no sympathy as he followed me all around Glendale. I told him I understood the importance of California economy (that's all he wanted to talk about), but I also told him I was concerned that no one would tell me about LaRouche's take on any, ANY, of the other issues facing every single American citizen right now. Albert said, "Well, perhaps there's a problem with your approach to politics." That did it. That did it right there. Here's how it went down:

PRINCE: I don't have a problem. Who says there's only one approach to politics?

ALBERT: Where is Schwarzenegger gonna find $150 million?

PRINCE: What? I don't know.

ALBERT: It's coming out of education.

PRINCE: I'm voting for Dean.

ALBERT: Why you wanna back a weenie? Just because he's on TV all the time?

PRINCE: I was a Dean supporter long before he was blip on the radar. And is that your approach to politics? To insult the other candidates? And to insult people with a different political ideology than you?

ALBERT: There are a lot of things wrong with the Democratic party.

PRINCE: Don't you think I know there are things wrong with the Democratic party?

ALBERT: So why are you supporting a candidate backed by the Democrats?

PRINCE: Because there’s a problem with my approach to politics.

ALBERT: Well...now you're just being...that's just....

At that point, I slipped into the Baja Fresh bathroom to escape.

A note to LaRouche and LaRouche supporters: STOP BEING ASSHOLES. Let's hypothesize that LaRouche has the best platform out of anyone in existence and you're able to convince me of that. Even so, I'll tell you right now that I don't want to belong to any club that has PEOPLE LIKE YOU as members. You don't get people to support your cause by being CONDESCENDING PRICKS.

Let's review our lesson for today. LaRouche = ASS. LaRouche Supporters = HOLES. The LaRouche Campaign = ASSHOLES. Somebody better do something about it. And quick.

[I eventually did some research on Lyndon LaDouche. O. M. G.]